Carol Anne Costa: Boston, Oklahoma City, & Remembering Baylee
Thursday, April 18, 2013
As the events in Boston unfold it leaves me again sickened, shaken, and indignant. It is 2am on Tuesday and I am wide eyed, restless, sad, and angry. I cannot stop the images racing through my head. The Boston Marathon bombing began an awful replay of the loop of images, feelings of fear, anger and resolve that reside in me when these things occur. But for reasons unknown even to me, I always come back to Baylee. She is for me the lasting reminder of lives unlived.
The Slaughter of the Innocents Continues
Today I met Martin William Richard, a smiling 8 year old from Dorchester, Mass., described by his headmaster as a bright, energetic young boy who had big dreams. His last act by most accounts was to enjoy Patriots Day with his family, eat ice cream and cheer the runners on at the finish line of the Boston Marathon on Boylston Street. My social media feeds published pictures of his happy face holding a sign he made writing, “No more hurting people, PEACE” in indelible marker. Now Martin has left an indelible mark on all of us, as he too becomes a life unlived.
The images of Baylee Almon, the Sandy Hook Elementary victims, Hadiya Pendleton, the Columbine kids, and now precious Martin Richard flash like a slideshow in my head. They become part of our individual and collective memories, and it is up to us not to forget them, as well as to work tirelessly against terrorism and violence.
Dealing with the Pain
As we process the attack on Boston it is raw, the reasons opaque, the investigation ongoing and the grief plentiful. We all will manage the flood of information and the realization of the danger and evil in our own ways. In an interview with Alex Wagner on MSNBC, Dr. Jeffrey Lieberman explained the impact of the trauma and in part, reaction. “In addition to being an emotional trauma, it was a violation, a violation of the sanctity of the spirit of the day. It really penetrates to the core of people's sense of security.”
For me, I will hug the children in my life longer and harder, I will be vigilant, I will pray for Bostons’s dead, hurt and injured, I will work for peace, I will like so many Americans rise in the face of evil and today, I will remember Baylee.
Find Psychology Today's resource page for parents and children on dealing with tragedy here.
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