Fit for Life: Are You a Problem Solver, or a Problem Enhancer?

Saturday, November 23, 2019

Matt Espeut, GoLocalWorcester Health +Lifestyle Contributor

Matt Espeut

We all feel unique. We feel that people don’t understand what we are going through, or the problems we face. We feel like our circumstances differ from everyone else and sometimes we feel like we are isolated on an island.

Well, I have news for you.

YOU ARE NOT UNIQUE OR THAT MUCH DIFFERENT FROM ANYONE ELSE.

If fact, most of your struggles, concerns, setbacks, and unfavorable experiences have happened to many more before you and will happen too many more after you.

All humans have problems, and all of us will face losses, and setbacks. On the flip side, we will all chalk up wins, have fun, and experience moments of happiness throughout our lives too.

I get all this from communicating with others, listening to podcasts, and reading books. I have come to the conclusion that as humans, we all have similar characteristics, we all experience stressful situations, all struggle and basically ALL want to be happy and enjoy life.

What makes us different is how we handle situations when the going gets tough.

Are you a problem solver, or a problem enhancer?

As I said earlier, we all face problems, but only a certain few know how to handle them productively when they arise.

If something doesn’t go my way, or there are issues and roadblocks in front of me, I try to solve the situation or find an alternate route. I have learned over the years to become proactive instead of reactive, and to try to solve problems and issues before they blow up into something worse.

I have also learned how to apply emotional discipline to difficult situations, ask for help and communicate with others involved.

On the contrary, you could act irrationally, make compulsive decisions, NOT communicate with others involved, and turn a small solvable problem into a situation that will take longer to resolve.

When you fail at something, do you quit altogether, or do you learn and try harder the next time.

A situation arose last week when one of my team members was trying to post an ad to social media and the ad kept getting rejected. She got a little frazzled, and couldn’t understand why they kept rejecting her great looking ad. I told her that it wasn’t her fault, keep trying other methods, and don’t give up until we succeed with this task. If we give up, we lose days of marketing, as opposed to taking some extra time and getting it correctly.

What truly separates us as humans is our actions and thought processes.

When all environmental or outside factors are universal, it’s thoughts and actions that make us unique. Our reactions and problem-solving ability is usually the difference between a happy successful life and the alternative, a miserable existence.

Are there exceptions to the rule? Most definitely.

I’m reading a book called Mastery, and in one chapter they talk about the life of Wolfgang Mozart.

Was he gifted? Absolutely!

Mozart although an exception to greatness, his mind as a four-year-old was even more open and impressionable than that of a child a few years older. He was immersed in and enchanted by music from the very beginning of his life.

With pressure, support, and encouragement from his father, he became one of the greatest composers in history. The story also tells about his countless hours of instruction and practice it took him to reach that level.

Like everyone else that’s good at something, he needed to work his ass off to reach the status he accomplished.

Would he still have been great without practice, persistence and consistency? Probably not.

Would any average Joe that starts playing music at age 4 and practicing relentlessly, like he did, reach his status? Maybe.

The point is, in order to master something whether it be playing music or hitting a baseball, EVERYONE needs to put the work in.

Gifted or not, in order to be successful at something, you need to show up every day, and I think that’s what separates us as humans.

Thought process, and actions.

When you take action and repeat a process over and over, you get good. When we let negative thoughts pollute our subconscious minds, we tend to set ourselves up for failure.

How we make decisions is another big factor that gives us a different outcome than someone with the same problems and circumstances.

When you are down and out, do you decide to hit the bottle, pop some pills, and distance yourself from the world, or do you decide that you’re not going to play victim and stand up and attack your situation head on.

Once again, it’s the thought process, decisions, and actions we take that will create a unique outcome to our situation.

Remember, we are all in this together, and although we all live slightly different lifestyles, we are not unique on many different levels.

For the most part, we all want to be successful, take care of our loved ones, and overall want happiness.

As humans, it’s instinctive and a natural need for us to seek out these things.

Joe Rogan puts it best in one of his podcasts:

Happiness is like hunger it’s always there. Sometimes it comes out strong, and sometimes we need to battle obstacles to get it, however there are ways we can help control our happiness.

One is to ELIMINATE the things that make you unhappy.

You can make decisions as to who you will surround yourself with.

Your thought process can ask if someone makes me better or worse.

Your actions will dictate whether you cut the negative people from your life.

Don’t waste your energy with negative people that won’t help you or do the right things for themselves.

If you hang with the right people, they will make you feel and want to be better, so it’s in your control that you chose who you surround yourself with.

People, like food are nutrients and fuel.

They can be either good for you, or they can be toxic, and we all need good fuel to thrive and survive

Life will never be at a 10 all the time for anyone.

It’s up to us to change our thoughts and actions in order to put ourselves in a position to win.

That’s what makes us different.

We will all struggle, so be realistic and conquer life, because it’s not in our DNA to seek comfort, but it is in us to challenge ourselves, solve problems and seek happiness.

Committed to your success,

Matt Espeut, GoLocal's Health & Lifestyle Contributor has been a personal trainer and health & fitness consultant for over 25 years. He is the owner of Fitness Profiles, a one on one, and small group personal training company, as well as Providence Fit Body Boot Camp, located at 1284 North Main St., on the Providence/Pawtucket line. You can reach Matt at (401) 453-3200; on Facebook at "Matt Espeut", and on Twitter at @MattEspeut. "We’re all in this life together – let’s make it a healthy one.